Or: Idle Hands are the Devil’s Playthings
As I thumbed through the channels last night debating what to watch, I stumbled across a movie called “The Weight of Water” on HBO. It was 12:30 a.m., and any reasonable person would have been going to bed. I however, have no job, so I said to my self, “self. You have no job. Watch this movie. I heard that Elizabeth Hurley shows her boobs.” So I spent two hours watching a movie I had no interest seeing because I thought maybe I might get about 3 seconds of beautiful Liz Hurley boob action. This is why being occupationally challenged rules. I have the freedom to make ridiculous choices.
As I thumbed through the channels last night debating what to watch, I stumbled across a movie called “The Weight of Water” on HBO. It was 12:30 a.m., and any reasonable person would have been going to bed. I however, have no job, so I said to my self, “self. You have no job. Watch this movie. I heard that Elizabeth Hurley shows her boobs.” So I spent two hours watching a movie I had no interest seeing because I thought maybe I might get about 3 seconds of beautiful Liz Hurley boob action. This is why being occupationally challenged rules. I have the freedom to make ridiculous choices.
In other news, I am in the process of texting my friend (and I use the term loosely) Brad everyday about how I hate the Colts. He is a die-hard Colts fan and that makes me want to throw up. Yesterday's text: "I wish I had a giant asshole so I could fly over Indianapolis and spray everyone with diarrhea." Today's text: "Know what the 'U' on the Colts' helmets stands for? Urinary tract infection. Because they all have them."
If anyone has any other ideas, please, help me out.
Go Chargers.
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Q: What do you call 47 millionaires around a TV watching the Super Bowl?
A: The Indianapolis Colts.
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